I'm happy to announce to you suckers that my birthday is just a few days away! On Sunday, April 9, I will reach another year of my amazing life and I can't wait to celebrate this special day.
I have made a name for myself internationally as a money lord, and accordingly, I have many loyal paying monkeys who support my luxuries. That's why I've decided that this year, in honor of my birthday, I'm going to splurge extra big.
I expect tributes from you! Without excuses and whining!
Do your part to make my birthday extra special. I expect real tributes, not chump change.